six pack abs

I need to exercise a bit more, I know this.  I keep promising myself that I’m going to get out there and hit the gym.  But I have a vacation coming up next week so I didn’t want to get all involved in cleaning up my act only to break down, revert back to the slob I was and then feel like a failure.  (Does any of this sound familiar?)  Mental atitude has a lot to do with how successful we are going to be in this life and I like thinking positive.  I imagine myself doing things in my sleek, shiny new body and it ain’t half bad.  You can do so much in your mind (if you put your mind to it) that with hardly more than a chair and a window to gaze out on you could become the president of the United States.  The potential is limitless.  I’ve imagined myself with Halle Berry and she ain’t half bad either.  Shucks, with little or no effort I could imagine all kinds of possibilities.

Experts tell us we should plan out our deeds in advance, working out all the details in our minds then when we actually attempt the feat it will go as if by rote.  Tell that to the bank robber doing 10-20 years.  Perhaps the experts spend too much time imagining their advice will be beneficial without actually putting their ideas into practice.  Remember not too long ago we were cautioned by the experts not to discipline our children and with what result?  Millions of brats roaming the world who won’t listen to, respond to or obey their parents.  Also we were told to encourage and nuture our children, use upbuilding speech and never scold or belittle them, praise their accomplishments, minimize their failures, etc.  Now we have a class of 20 somethings that can’t cope in the work force, who think they should be paid top dollar for minimal work and can’t understand why they aren’t appreciated more for just showing up.  (Hey Joe! Made it to work today!  A little late, but who am I to complain?   Did you get that report read yet?  No?  Oh well, just a critique of company policy on tardiness, who cares?  Good job!)

But what does this have to do with all the tea in China?  Well, believe it or not… they say tea is good for us, too.  So imagine if you will a bunch of fat, under-appreciated colonials dressed up like indians at the Boston Tea Party planning their dastardly deed mentally in advance.  Might go something like this…

1st colonial bank:  “Ugh! I think this tea tax is for the birds!  Lets pitch it over the side!”

2nd colonial penn insurance man:  “Are you insane?  Think of the liability!  Think of the pollution, we could be sued!”

3rd colonologist: “Think of Halle Berry!”

1st colonial bank: “What about taxation without representation?”

2nd colonial penn insurance man: “The English are only thinking of our well being, do you know about the anti-toxens in tea?  We could lose all this flab and have six pack abs.”

3rd colonologist:  “Yeah, and there’s nothing surer then death and taxes!  I’d rather think of Halle Berry!”

1st colonial bank:  “So we are agreed then, the tea must go?”

2nd colonial penn insurance man: ” I didn’t dress in this get up to go pitch tea in Boston Harbor, I’d rather think of Halle Berry, too.”

1st colonial bank:  “So much for our mother of freedom and the birth of democracy!”

3rd colonologist:  “Who’s she?”

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One Response to “six pack abs”

  1. The Bitniks Says:

    Nice post, bookmark it

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